Thursday, November 29, 2007

American Gangster (Russel Crowe, Denzel Washington;2007)


MY FOURTH GRADE TEACHER WAS A RUDE 400 POUND DYKE. SHE HAD A HAIR CUT LIKE PAT BENATAR AND A BODY LIKE AFRICAN AN ELEPHANT. SHE COULD HAVE USED A STRONG APPETITE SUPPRESSANT LIKE HEROIN OR COCAINE. WHICH BRINGS ME TO THE STAR OF THIS 3 HOUR DRUG DRAMA: LADY H. ANY MOVIE THAT STARS A PHONE THROWING AUSSIE, PRE-AIDS BLOOD-SOAKED NEEDLES, THE VIET CONG AND A RACIALLY CHARGED TRIGGER HAPPY DRUG LORD, PLAYED BY THE BLACK GUY IN 1991'S RICOCHET, IS A FORMULA FOR HOLLYWOOD MAGIC. IF STEVE GUTTENBERG HAD A CAMEO IN THIS OSCAR WORTHY ROMP I WOULD HAVE CRIED. MORAL OF THIS GODSEND:

CRIME PAYS ACROSS 110TH STREET. SCRUFF MGRUFF SAYS, "SEE THE MOVIE, BUY THE SOUNDTRACK, HIT THE VEIN."

No comments: