YOU EVER FART IN AN ELEVATOR AND THEN START TALKING REALLY LOUD TO DISTRACT THE OTHER PASSENGERS FROM THE SMELL YOU CREATED? THAT'S KIND OF LIKE THIS MOVIE. YOU THINK YOUR VIEWING SOMETHING WITH SOME SUBSTANCE, LIKE OUR FLATULENT CULPRIT DAZZLING THE PASSENGERS WITH LOUD CONVERSATION, ONLY TO WALK OUT TWO HOURS LATER REALIZING YOU'VE JUST BEEN HAD. IF YOU WANT TO PAY TO WATCH ALIENS (DISGUISED AS EMOTIONLESS, INSOMNIAC ASSHOLES) TAKING OVER THE WORLD, GO TO WALL ST. OTHERWISE, DON'T WASTE YOUR MONEY ON THIS LOUSY RE-MAKE.
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