LET ME JUST START OFF BY SAYING, "THIS MOVIE IS A 300 YARD DRIVE." WHICH IS IMPRESSIVE. I MAY NOT PLAY GOLF, BUT I'VE HAD SEX ON A GOLF COURSE, AND I COULD ONLY SHOOT TO HER CLAVICLE OUT OF THE ROUGH. HENCE MY NICKNAME, TIGER WOOD. THE WEAK LINK IN THIS FILM, IN CASE YOU DIDN'T GRADUATE FROM PRE-SCHOOL, IS OBVIOUSLY JESSICA BIEL. AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED, EDWARD NORTON WAS ACTUALLY A 19TH CENTURY HOUDINI. I'D REFER TO DAVID BLAINE, BUT I'VE SEEN STREET MAGIC, AND IT TURNS ORDINARY PEOPLE INTO ADDICTS AND THIEVES. I CHOOSE THE HIGH ROAD BY NOT SUPPORTING ANY DRUG DR. CRUISE WON'T PRESCRIBE, SINCE HE RECIEVED HIS P.H.D. IN PSYCHOLOGY ON THE TODAY SHOW. I THINK TOM LEARNED HIS LESSON WHEN HE TURNED HIS OLDEST SON INTO A 6 FOOT, AFRICAN-AMERICAN TEENAGER. PERSONALLY, I WOULD'VE FELT RELIEVED THAT HE WASN'T A 5 FOOT 2, CLOSETED HOMOSEXUAL SCIENTOLIGIST. THEN AGAIN, I'M OLD FASHIONED, AND I DIGRESS INTO ABSCURE NON-SEQUITORS...ANYWAY, ED NORTON COULD PLAY PINNOCHIO AND I'D SUE WALT DISNEY FOR CLAIMING HIS CHARACTER'S FICTIONAL. THE POINT BEING, CASTING NORTON WITH BIEL IS LIKE WATCHING PHIL MICKELSON FINISH THE PGA TOUR ON GOLDEN TEE. SURE, IT'S STILL "A HOLE IN ONE," BUT NOW I FEEL THE NEED TO CLUB SOMETHING. I RESTRAINED FROM PROVIDING A MOVIE SYNOPYSIS BECAUSE I ASSUME EVERYONE'S SEEN THIS MOVIE. IF YOU HAVEN'T, FOLLOW THE CROWD AND RENT IT TODAY. CHEERS. TMJ
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